okay so thursday night me and brian were riding some brick quarterpipes in this rich neighborhood in newport beach and i said "hey brian, isnt it weird that whenever we ride we dont ever get busted?"  of course he lashed back with "dont jinx it you mother f-er"  ...

then 15 minutes later a paranoid cop shows up yelling at us to sit on the ground.  he's got his flashlight all over us within 2 seconds and is asking a hundred questions like we're some kind of criminals.  it was retarded - the same questions over and over and over just to see if we could keep our story straight.  either he was making sure our stories were straight or he was soo confused that two kids would come allll the way from irvine just to ride some perfect brick quarters.  i dont know - he said "let me get this straight..." or "are you telling me" or ..."why would two kids..." so many times i stopped listening completely.  at one point another officer shows up while he was like "are you telling me....blah blah blah.....".  i had stopped listeniing already and when i zoned back in from my confused mind, i heard, "...am i right? you're either the first one, or the second one."  all i could say was "yes, the second one".  i was hoping i hadnt convicted myself of some heinous crime.  whichever guess i took, i figured it was better than smugly saying, "im sorry, i wasnt listening." 

so then he violates me in a hundred different ways by making fun of my picture in my liscense, searching me, dissing my bmx skills, and a bunch of other stupid things.  all this while still asking me why someone would drive all the way out to newport to ride some brick quarters.  then a third cop shows up, a fat man with a beer guy and handlebar mustache.  he spends a good 10 minutes searching my moms car, finds nothing, returns, and has a secret conversation with the other two officers.  they're mumbling so low right in front of us i was sure they were going to plant some weed, coke, or wutever they could find to make themselves look like big shots.  sucks for them , they couldnt pin us with anything...the only thing is the "no bike lights, both front and rear" citation.  which was bull anyway.

then the paranoid-butt cops search all the bushes within sight for any evidence to pin against us.  i dont know, it was retarded though .  they kept us there for about 1 hour now, only to confirm that we were indeed, what we said we were. so a fourth cop shows up now looking confused as ever. they let us go finally and as i ride past him and greet him with 'suup'.  but hes confused so he just stares at me cockeyed as i ride away.

and jinxing stuff is probably real too.  -jeff 19

hm. happy birthday to you. happy, birthday - to you. happy BIRTHday: dear iris. happy birthday. to you.

On september 14th, god created the heavens and the earth.  And the Lord put a woman named Wing Sze next to the tree of life and God said, "be fruitful and raiseth many pets that will increase in number and fill your apartment in which you live.  And God said, "Let your pets not be limited to live pets, but do not forget to have stuffed pets too.  You will name the first pet 'Lamara,' which will mean, love bear of that from Ikea.  God saw that Lamara was good, so God said, "let the parents of Lamara, Jamara Poo and Camara, be blessed and stay in the apartment in which you live.  Then, you will love and cherish a holstein rightly dubbed, "Moofasa," who will bear many fruits from the tree of life.  Moofasa shall do all of the included, but not lmited to, daily tasks: eat carpet, sleep, honor thy mother and thy father, be like "ho ho hooo my name is moofasa," and go to school.  And the Lord saw all the he hath made, and it was VERY good. and there was much rejoicing.

some people will read this, some will not, but everybody will think im a boob for being so disgusting.  i still find disgusting people out pretty funny.  well, if you dont like it, then dont do it.  if you think its funny, then cool.  if you're still reading this, then get a life.

Happy BIRTHDAY! i love you with all of my warm, purple, large, Aortic pump.  If you were a condiment, you'd be ....relish because you're sweet and sour, zesty, fresh and pleasureful.  Even though you hate pickles - which probably leads me to conclude that you hate relish too. 

But relish isnt for everyone.  It has a sour tangy taste that is sometimes rejected at the first taste to some people.  Sometimes the taste is acquired over time too, but then soon forgotten.  Then there are those who enjoy it vigorously spoonful after spoonful.  I will be that man with the spoon in my hand, while i play in a band, without a music stand, and while i travel the land.  because i love relish.  and you too iris. :)

*heh. * ho ho ho ho hoooookay. *haah? * hooo mebbe mebbe.  *guppies!* *NOooooOOO... *not just a hat rack my friend... *MY sandwhich?!* and lastly but definitely not leastly....ehh. heh heh heh....nervous laughter....*

143 637 247 aZn RoBbIn "4rM dA" HoOd

yesterday i drove to petaluma with dustin and dennis to watch a bmx comp at ramp rats

at the afterparty, dustin and dennis got the crap beat out of them by ryan sher, ryan fudger, mike parenti, and im guessing a few other san diegans.  well i wasnt there cuz i was with iris... but it was wild

3 hours and 12 stitches later, we got lost in san francisco looking for potrero and 24th looking for a flippin walgreens... stupid doctor gave us faulty directions....

the night finally ended at 530 am...wild.

stupid kids i hate kids

i hate them they are mischevious kiniving poo piles

they smell and they are lyrically challenged.

why do i hate them?

1 sprained hand. bump on chin.  hit my head(but nothing to show for it)